“It’s ok to not be ok!”
This is something we have all heard and been told over the last 10/11 months. I know I have said it myself many times.
But what when it’s not ok to be ok with not being ok?
What when all you can feel is resistance to being ok with it all? What when all you want to do is scream “I can’t be ok with not being ok?” (There may be a couple of bad f words in there also)
There are many times when we just want everything to be better, to feel better. And allowing yourself to just feel the ‘not ok-ness’ of everything seems like too much.
How many of us are pretending that we are ok? Pasting a calm state of being over the internal storms that are raging? Saying that we are fine and just getting on with things? When all we want to do is let the storm f*cking rage! Let the not ok-ness roar through us, move our bodies so it can finally begin to be released?
And I suppose that the statement ‘it’s ok to not be ok’ is in some way giving that permission, but for me it doesn’t feel that way. Maybe it’s ok or accepted to say that I/we are not ok….but can I express it?
Can I roar it?
Can I cry it?
Can I hit out at it?
Can I shake it out my body until all I can do is lie down?
Can I be with be ok to let myself truly express it?
How much longer can we go on not fully expressing it, without exploding?
I know I am at a stage where I need to fully express my not ok-ness! I’m not fully sure how yet, but the energy needs to move.
Whatever your ‘not ok-ness’ is, can you find a way to fully express it? To let it out of your body?
We are in extraordinary times, times where external restrictions have never been tighter……so, can we begin to release ourselves from the inside out? Can we find a way to free ourselves from internal restrictions?